J u no

I guess, I mean, I suppose I have to say, that I am a writer. I could be a teacher, I love to encourage others to blossom. I am a great appreciator of the unique in each of us. But when people ask me "who I am" or what inspires me... I have to say, and honestly, I am an observer, and sometimes a fixer, when allowed. Too, I am constantly inspired by the people around me, by this world around me. I get inspired by all of "your" great ideas, dreams, hopes and futures. I sometimes think if there was such a thing as reincarnation... I am not likely here to do much aside from watching. People fascinate me. I think I fall in love even with the ones who dislike me. I can't explain it, save I know they have their stories, too, and that IF one were able to dig deep enough into their backgrounds, one would find out the "why" and "how" of who they are. People "know" stuff. Some are born to "do" things. They come out knowing what their passion is, they immediately have a purpose, a drive. Me, I was just happy to be here, and pleased as punch to look, listen, and be, with alot of puddle whomping, getting dirty and twirling around thrown in. Seriously, it's all I wanted to do... So, when I'm faced with people who "know" what they want out of life, where they want to "go" and who they want to "be", I become overwhelmed. I want to be loved and appreciated. I want to be enjoyed. This is why I go back and back to the theater. It's an easy fix. I am so often blown away by the people around me, that I think to myself, what could I possibly have to offer, there are so many wonderful people out there, who am I, just a... 47 year old woman, mother of two totally amazing sons, girlfriend to a brilliantly creative, clever, kind man, disenfranchised daughter, estranged sibling, who happens to write some poetry, enjoys occasionally sketching and dabbling in other artistic mediums, loves the theatre and film, reading, and walking about, while studying people. I so very much enjoy my niece-ah-lees, and nephlinks, and miss my 4-yr. olds, but the young men they've become constantly enthralls, enchants and enrapts me, like you can't believe, like they can't ever likely "really" know. So what it is it I'm trying to say here...? not sure, just actually trying to work it out.